Most people have some difficulty with self-confidence to some degree, and some do more than others. We put together a list of things that can help boost your confidence in general, or on those days you are feeling particularly low.
1. Write down your good qualities.
These could be physical, emotional or spiritual qualities. It matters not. Just write them all down, and spare no details. It doesn’t matter if they are “little” things (awesome at Scrabble) or more significant things (poetry genius). Review this list at least once per day. Read them over and over if you’d like. Just be sure that when you read them, you really feel them and know them to be true.
2. Accomplish goals, even little ones.
Make a list of all the things you would like to accomplish – short term and long term. This could be as easy as getting an ‘A’ in History to as complex as climbing a mountain. It could be something you want to do tomorrow, this week, or even today. The part that will help you build your confidence is crossing these things off the list. With each goal reached, you will feel more and more fulfilled and happy with yourself.
Not only can exercise help us look good, it also (and more importantly) helps us feel good. It’s not just all in your head either, it’s quite scientific. Exercising releases hormones called endorphins, which work to both improve your mood and relieve stress. It also gives you another sense of achievement, because you just did something to improve your health and state of mind. Confidence is directly impacted by all of those positive factors.
4. Join something.
Do something that you love to do with other people who also love it. Some examples include dance class, playing in a band, singing in a church choir, attending a book club, joining a volleyball team, going to a Bible study, volunteering, taking a cooking class, and more. The possibilities are vast – all you have to do is look.
When you see how many people there are out there sharing your interests, you will realize that the things that are important to you are significant. Sharing that joy with people who feel mutually about it will be a constant reminder that you are a fun and interesting person.
5. Know your personality type.
Some people are introverts who prefer peace, quiet and alone time. Some are extroverts who thrive on socializing and action-packed activities. Some people are open and outgoing, and some are very private. Some like dogs, some like cats. Some say “po-tay-to”, some say “po-tah-to”.
Take some time to really get to know yourself and your personality. Make sure you write everything down, and be sure you are thinking of who you really are, not who you wish you were. This activity is about understanding yourself and being comfortable with who you are as a person. Start by answering the following questions:
- Am I outgoing or reserved?
- What movies and TV shows do I like?
- What are my hobbies?
- Who do I admire?
- What is/was my favorite subject in school?
- What are my favorite books?
- Where do I want to travel?
Every once in a while, take an evening to just baby yourself. This could be whatever you want it to be as long as you feel pampered, like “Man, I’ve got it good.” Some examples on how to pamper yourself (and some of these may be gender specific) include: taking a bubble bath, getting a massage, painting your nails, drinking a big cup of cocoa, playing your favorite video game, getting a haircut, meditating, getting lost in a great book, or simply taking a nice long nap. Once you feel like you’ve really taken good care of yourself, you will feel like you can take on the world.
7. List the good things you have done.
Many people are so selfless that they do not realize or acknowledge all the wonderful things they have done. Even small things, like opening a door for an elderly person, can remind yourself that you are kind and good. And so we ask that you make yet another list of any and all good things you have done or even said.
Example: Helped sister with homework, drove grandpa to the bank, did the dishes for Mom, bought Ashley a birthday present, donated a dollar to the SPCA, loaned John a pencil, volunteered for the church picnic, watched the neighbors cat, watered Aunt Linda’s plants while she was away…
- Don’t jump to conclusions. Chances are there is much more to it than that and you’ll end up worrying over nothing.
- Don’t take everything personally. There’s a better chance it’s not personal at all.
- When anything good happens, celebrate. Be aware of the good and count your blessings as they come.
- Don’t overgeneralize. This means don’t exaggerate the bad things. It may cause you to think everything is bad.
- Give yourself a break. Stop thinking of how things should be; realize when things are fine as they are.
- Realize that everyone has flaws. Nobody is perfect and everyone makes mistakes. Everyone.
What kind of clothes do you look or feel your best in? Throw them on as often as possible. This could be a dress with heels, a shirt and tie, or a tee shirt and jeans. Just make sure you feel awesome while you are wearing them.
10. Stand up straight.
Good posture is such a simple and overlooked thing. When we sit or stand up straight, we stick out the check, hold our heads up high, and straighten our backs. Not only will this make you feel more confident, but you will look more confident as well. The mere action of standing up straight tricks the brain into thinking “I am confident.” When we slouch, it’s like the world is literally dragging us down. Standing up straight instructs the body to be ready for anything that comes your way.
If you have any other ideas on how to boost your confidence, anything that has worked for you, please feel free to share.