Here are Jill’s answers, in reference to the 50 Questions Everyone Should Ask Themselves post.
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How old would you be if you didn’t know how old you are?
20 (I’m actually 27)
Which is worse, failing or never trying?
Never trying! Failing stinks but with it comes lessons learned and improvement of character.
If life is so short, why do we do so many things we don’t like and like so many things we don’t do?
Because we “have” to. I’ve been told many times that sometimes we have to do things we don’t want to do. And maybe that is true to an extent, but if your life is being taken over by doing things you don’t want to do, something is very wrong.
When it’s all said and done, will you have said more than you’ve done?
At this point, yes. I get excited about ideas and possibilities, but when it comes time to take action I get too anxious and buckle back down.
What is the one thing you’d most like to change about the world?
Too much anger. People are so quick to become angry so quickly, which drives them to say things to hurt others. I notice this especially on the internet. People can be so cruel online, hurting innocent people’s feelings because they can.
If happiness was the national currency, what kind of work would make you rich?
Performing for people. I’d like to play guitar, sing, or make them laugh.
Are you doing what you believe in, or are you settling for what you are doing?
With HIBhub, I am not settling. I am trying to help people feel better about themselves and erase negativity. That’s extremely fulfilling.
If the average human life span was 40 years, how would you live your life differently?
I would take more time to do the things I always say I’m going to do. I probably would have started a business by now. I would be living by the ocean. I would be in a band. I would have joined a local adult soccer team (that one’s a smaller-scale goal).
To what degree have you actually controlled the course your life has taken?
About 50%. I usually make decisions based on what will make others happy – my parents, friends, significant other – they are usually a direct influence on the things I decide to do. I have always had the ability to be in control but chose not to.
Are you more worried about doing things right, or doing the right things?
They go hand in hand. If I’m not doing the right thing, I’m automatically not doing it right!
You’re having lunch with three people you respect and admire. They all start criticizing a close friend of yours, not knowing she is your friend. The criticism is distasteful and unjustified. What do you do?
I don’t like to cause tension or stir up trouble, but I would just say some positive things about that person and add that I never noticed about that person what they are talking about. I would ask them to cite examples because they will probably discover after I ask that question that their comments were unjustified and rude.
If you could offer a newborn child only one piece of advice, what would it be?
You’re at the beginning of your life, which is an incredible gift. Appreciate it and enjoy it.
Would you break the law to save a loved one?
To save their life? Absolutely.
Have you ever seen insanity where you later saw creativity?
Yeah hi, Lady Gaga? I love her though.
What’s something you know you do differently than most people?
I don’t drink. 99% of the people I am surrounded by do, but I don’t like it so I don’t. I don’t let this affect how much fun I have and never let people pressure me into it.
How come the things that make you happy don’t make everyone happy?
Some people are too stressed out, depressed or afraid to appreciate the good things in life. Their minds are not clear, so they don’t recognize how wonderful it is that they have a warm bed to sleep in, a cup of hot coffee to comfort them, or a nice quiet night to read a book.
What one thing have you not done that you really want to do? What’s holding you back?
Start a business. The investment, possibility of failure, and the undoubtedly long and stressful road ahead are holding me back.
Are you holding onto something you need to let go of?
Mistakes I’ve made. Sometimes I also remember mean / harsh things that were said to me in the past and it gets me down about myself. Even something as simple as a road-raging driver giving the the finger is enough to get me down for a few days. Sometimes I cringe when I think of the careless things I’ve done or said to other people too. I need to let go of indiscretions, conflicts and negativity from the past. It’s all behind me now.
If you had to move to a state or country besides the one you currently live in, where would you move and why?
Somewhere warm and sunny, but not too far away from my family. Maybe the coast of North Carolina.
Do you push the elevator button more than once? Do you really believe it makes the elevator faster?
Nope. I know it doesn’t help anything. I am often in a hurry but I guess I am generally patient in elevators! I will never forget the elderly gentlemen who told me to “never be in a hurry”, because life flies by too quickly as it is. Plus, hurrying just adds stress. 90% of the time, we don’t really need to be hurrying anyway. Or the stress of hurrying is usually a waste of energy anyway. It rarely actually saves you time.
Would you rather be a worried genius or a joyful simpleton?
Joyful simpleton hands down! You don’t have to be a genius to be smart.
Why are you, you?
It’s a combination between nature and nuture. My parents’ and grandparents’ traits have shaped my personality in certain ways. I have my Mom’s work ethic and my Dad’s sweet tooth. I worry like my Grandpa, and I’m quiet like my Grandma.
But teachers, coaches, friends, coworkers, and media have all influenced me as well. If it weren’t for the friends I had growing up, I might not be as funny or quick-witted. If I hadn’t watched Nickelodeon, I would have never seen Clarissa Explains it All and maybe wouldn’t have become interested in computers.
There are just so many factors that go into why we are the way we are. There is no simple answer.
Have you been the kind of friend you want as a friend?
I could probably call more often to say Hello, pay more visits and maybe give more gifts. Just show more interest in general. There is one friend in particular I haven’t been very kind too recently, because he has been living his life in a way that I don’t agree with. Even so, he doesn’t deserve to be treated poorly. I need to make amends.
Which is worse, when a good friend moves away, or losing touch with a good friend who lives right near you?
When a good friend moves away. At least if you lose touch with a good friend who is nearby, you have a pretty decent chance of rekindling the friendship. That is much more difficult to do if someone lives far away from you.
What are you most grateful for?
My family. I am very fortunate to have parents and a sister who are all so loving, supportive and fun. I’m also SO grateful for our health and well being. The most serious thing we have encountered so far has been my Dad’s thyroid cancer (which is gone).
Would you rather lose all of your old memories, or never be able to make new ones?
I would rather be able to make new ones. Who says my old memories would be better than the new ones? I have a long life ahead of me.
Is it possible to know the truth without challenging it first?
Nope. All “truths” need to be tested. There are few things that are unquestionably 100% certain.
Has your greatest fear ever come true?
I’m not even sure what my greatest fear is.
Do you remember that time 5 years ago when you were extremely upset? Does it really matter now?
LOL nope.
What is your happiest childhood memory? What makes it so special?
I used to love grade school dances. It’s hard to say why they were so special. Obviously the best part was the possibility of being asked to dance, or finding a boyfriend in general. Is there any greater feeling than falling in love? Maybe that’s why they were happy memories, because of the hopeful anticipation of finding someone to love.
At what time in your recent past have you felt most passionate and alive?
I won’t go into the details, but getting out of an unhealthy relationship was the most liberating and relieving thing I’ve ever done. I have no doubt it was the right thing to do. Forcing a relationship that wasn’t meant to be caused such incredible negativity and tension in both of our lives.
If not now, then when?
When I have more money 😛
If you haven’t achieved it yet, what do you have to lose?
A sense of peace. Failure depresses me a lot. I feel fine right now, so why take the risk?
The answer to that is, because I shouldn’t let failure hold me back from achieving my dreams.
Have you ever been with someone, said nothing, and walked away feeling like you just had the best conversation ever?
Nope, not yet. Probably because silence makes me feel very uncomfortable. lol
Why do religions that support love cause so many wars?
That is a great question. The religions were probably established by good people but were ruined over the years by evil people. With good comes evil.
Is it possible to know, without a doubt, what is good and what is evil?
I don’t think humans are capable of 100% knowing anything without any doubts.
If you just won a million dollars, would you quit your job?
I would buy shares and make myself part-owner 😉
Would you rather have less work to do, or more work you actually enjoy doing?
More work I enjoy doing. I’m not a fan of having nothing to do. Although I don’t really believe in having nothing to do. There’s always something you can read, someone you can talk to, something you can do to entertain or better yourself.
Do you feel like you’ve lived this day a hundred times before?
Actually yes. Wow, I like that question. I need to shake things up a bit!
When was the last time you marched into the dark with only the soft glow of an idea you strongly believed in?
Never. Not yet. My ideas up to this point have been to “big” for me to carry through with.
If you knew that everyone you know was going to die tomorrow, who would you visit today?
I’d stay with my family. I love everyone else, but… family is number one priority.
Would you be willing to reduce your life expectancy by 10 years to become extremely attractive or famous?
Nah. Both of those traits are superfluous.
What is the difference between being alive and truly living?
If you’re alive, at the very least your heart is beating, you are breathing and there is oxygen reaching your brain. Truly living involves living your life to the fullest. Living in a way that makes you feel overjoyed by the fact that you’re alive.
When is it time to stop calculating risk and rewards, and just go ahead and do what you know is right?
You still have to consider risks to some extent. Be smart about things.
If we learn from our mistakes, why are we always so afraid to make a mistake?
Because it’s embarrassing and scary, and we put a lot of pressure on ourselves to be perfect.
What would you do differently if you knew nobody would judge you?
Live with my parents forever 😡
When was the last time you noticed the sound of your own breathing?
My last panic attack. Focusing on my breathing helps me calm down.
What do you love? Have any of your recent actions openly expressed this love?
Dogs. I pulled over last week to pick up a dog that almost got hit by a car running across a busy street. I brought him back to his owner and he was fine. The owners were a mother and son, and they were very grateful that he was alright.
I also show a lot of love to my own dogs. I scratch their bellies 🙂
In 5 years from now, will you remember what you did yesterday? What about the day before that? Or the day before that?
Probably not. But am I supposed to something important every day? That’s a pretty high expectation! Or is this a question about self awareness?
Decisions are being made right now. The question is: Are you making them for yourself, or are you letting others make them for you?
From now on, I am making them for myself. Things don’t turn out as well when you make them for others.