6 Important Tips for Targets

Being treated badly can have a number of effects on a person. It can cause us to lose self confidence, feel anxious or depressed, and repress feelings of anger. It is important to know there are things that you can do or consider when facing poor treatment from bullies. They are just another person, like the rest of us, and do not have any special credibility or power.

Take note of these tips the next time you are facing the negative effects of being bullied. They could really help you.

1. Develop a relationship with someone.

Make a conscious effort to befriend people, whether it be classmates, neighbors, team members, or pen pals. These relationships will improve your confidence and keep your spirits up. This is especially true if your friends have a very positive impact on you. They should be kind and helpful individuals. If they are mean, arrogant, negative, and just plain don’t make you feel good, then they are not the types of people you should be friends with.

2. Don’t believe any insults.

Bullies dish out insults because they intend to hurt someone. Understand that they will say these things whether or not they really believe them, or whether or not they are true. Know that their insults have no truth to them and remind yourself that their toxic words are empty and pointless. Remember all of your great qualities.

3. Get angry, but control your anger.

It is alright to get angry. When we feel emotions strongly, it is unhealthy to keep them in or to not express them fully. So do not suppress your anger, as that could ultimately do more harm than good. But do make sure you do this in a non-violent manner. Writing about your anger, fear or sadness is a fantastic way to harmlessly get your thoughts and emotions out of your head. Feel free to express these emotions so long as it feels good to get it all out. When you start to feel bad, that is your cue to stop.

4. Stay offline.

As helpful as it can be, the web is just full of trouble. It’s a popular place for bullying, harassment and abuse. Restrict your internet use to writing research papers, e-mailing (friends and family), reading the news, shopping, and anything that avoids the people that may treat you poorly. If you must use an online social network, make sure your privacy settings as strict as they can possibly be.

5. Tell the bully to stop.

Many people will tell you to “just ignore them”. This is good advice up to a certain point. If the bullying is repetitive and shows no signs of stopping, eventually there will come a time when you should assertively tell your bully (or bullies) to stop. You do not have to threaten or use physical violence to do this. Just stand up tall and say with confidence, “Please stop.”

6. Know that the bully has no power over you.

Bullies like to think they are powerful, but they are just human beings like everyone else. Nobody really has power over another, so do not think for a second that any bully is more powerful than you are. Only you have power over yourself.

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